HEY ALL U HOLY WHORES!! 🕳 😇👼!!! This week is 🎉🎉Easter 🥚 🪺 🙏!! You know what that means? 🤔 It’s time to HOP 🐇 over to Daddy Jesus hut 🛖so he can FUCK😫💦 u like a rabbit 🐇 before he feeds you that good dick 🍆 🍆 at the LAST SUPPER! 🍽 🍽 🍽 😙😛“This is my dick,🍆 which will be given up for you.”🔪 🍴 🔪 😮 😲 😋 😋 But Jesus isn’t the only one getting nailed 🔨 cum Friday.😏 😮 😮 😉 😉 On Saturday, Jesus will GET LAID 🛌 ↔️under that ROCK HARD tomb🪨 🪦 . Cum Easter Sunday, Daddy Jesus going to bust his rocks 🪨 so hard in his grave 🪦 💦 💦 , that he’ll be CUMMING 🥛🍆💦back from the dead💀 so he can fuck you again!! 🤪🤭🙏 After u and daddy FUCK 😫💦 then it’s time for ⛪️church⛪️🙏!!! 💤 😴 Don’t forget to wear your sluttiest outfit 😮 😂 to show off that pair of EASTER EGGS 👚 👗 🥫🥫✊ 🎈. Time for Easter Brunch! 🥘 🍽 But first, Daddy Jesus wants a 3️⃣SUM with you and the EASTER BUNNY!!! 😩🍆🍑💦 🐇😩🍆🍑😍💦😏😉. Then it’s time for the egg hunt 🕵🕵🕵!!! Search in every HOLE,😘😩 CRACK, 😫😍 and CREVICE 🤗😉😏 for the GRAND PRIZE 🤑😇: getting that 🏵🌸🌺PRETTY FLOWER BUD PUSSY 🪷 🍑🍣🌮 RODE BY Jesus on his camel 🐪 🐪 🐪 into the Easter sunset! ☀️ 🌅 🌅 Send this to all ur other EASTER BUNNY🐰🐰🐰 HOES👄😫🍆💦. If u get 5️⃣ back ur a ROTTEN COLORED EGG!!! 🤢If u get 🔟 back ur a LOADED 💋👅🙌🏻😉😏💦💦 EASTER BASKET 🧺. If you get 2️⃣0️⃣ back? UR GETTIN FUCKED 😱🍆🍑💦💦IN BOTH RABBIT 🐰🐇🐰HOLES🕳 🕳 TONIGHT!!!!

YOU ALREADY KNOW 😏😏😏 WHAT TIME IT IS⏰ IT'S SEVERENCE TIME 🏠🧠💦. WE GOT INNIES👇 OUTIES ☝️ AND BADDIES💦🍕💦 HERE IN MACRHOE DATA 👨‍💻📊 REFINEMENT. WE GOT 👧 MARK ASS 🍑🍑 DYLAN THE DILF 💋😩 IRV THE KING OF OLD MAN YAOI 👴💐👴AND GIRLBOSS🍑🍒 BAD BITCH👑👑 HELLY R. SOLVING 🔎🕵️ THE MYSTERIES OF LUMON ❓🏢❓ BUT LOOK OUT 👀👀👀 BECAUSE MILKSHAKE🐄😨 AND HIS FAT MILKERS 🐄 ARE ALWAYS WATCHING😈😈😈. WHAT SPICY🤫 SECRETS LIE IN THE WALLS 🧱OF SUPREME DADDY😫 KIER 🙏 WILL WE EVER GET ANOTHER MUSIC🎵 DANCE , 💃💃💃 SEXPERIENCE?? FIND OUT 🤓THIS WEEK ON THE GOAT 🐐🐐🐐 OF ALL SHOWS📺​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​

👋🏻HEY👋🏻 YOU seXXXy💋 LITTLE😫 💃🏼💃🏼SLUTS💃🏼👅‼️‼️📆Today📆 is 💥FUCKUARY 14TH💥 which means👨🏻DADDY CUPID💘💘 is 💦cumming💦 for you⚠️‼️‼️ He's been ✊🏼YANKING✊🏼😩on his bow🏹 and arrow💘 all night😖 getting ready to 🎯shoot😩👅💦 all over you 😱😩🤣😜😘😍🍆🍆💦💧 so Daddy Cupid draw 🔙 your bow 🏹and let that 💦🤣CUM FLOW➡️👅 💦 ‼️This day only 💦CUMS💦 once a year 📅so ❌rip off❌ your 👗clothes👙 and JUMP 👏🏻ON 👏🏻THAT👏🏻 GOOD 👏🏻DICK!😂😩💗 🙏🏻Saint🙌🏻 Valentine💕🌹 is the 💞SLUTTIEST 👄Saint there is, so 👈🏻spread👉🏻your holy 🙌🏻bible ⬅️wide➡️ to take everything 😵😬😍😆he's got🙏🏻. 💌☄️SEND💌to 5 💄VALENHOES💋so 👉🏻you👈🏻 can get 😫🤗OFF😊 tonight 👍🏻😵😜❤️💕‼️ if you 😵DON'T😵 you'll be 👎🏻STUCK ❌without❌ 😖CHOCColate🍫🍫 or 🥖long😩🍆thicc😱🍆 🌹PLOW-HERS🌷🌷for the next 6️⃣9️⃣ YEARS!!!! 😱😭😵😫😜😂😂

🎉🎉 BREAKING 🍑 NEWS 📣: RFK Jr. has been CONFIRMED 🔥💥 as the new 🕴️ HHS SEX-cretary 🌭🍆! This dude ain't just gonna regulate your health 🥗💪 – he’s also here to give you BRAIN WORM 💭🐛 insiDE your 🍆🍌! Imagine 🛏️🛌 dumping a DEAD BEAR 🐻💀 in CENTRAL PARK right while he’s doing a state of the union on 💦💦 HEALTH CARE 🩺🍑 FETISHES! I mean, who doesn't want a little furry action in the bedroom 🛏️🐻👉 for their HORMONE therapy 💊🍆!? So ladies, prepare your 🥵👙💦 because RFK Jr. is fixing to pump you up 📈🍆 while talking about the "health" of your PUSSY, let’s get STUFFED 😍💦🍑 like it’s Thanksgiving EVERY DAY! 🎊💯💦 Keep SENDING those BRAIN WORM memes 🐛💌 if you wanna score some sexy bonuses on HEALTH WEEK 💦🔥💋! This whole COUNTRY is about to get a taste of HIS 🇺🇸 COCKtastic policies 🍆🙌, so HOLD ON to your pants 👖, it seems like we’ve got a wild ride ahead! 🎢💦✨

🐍 DONG DONG QIANG 💯🙌🏻😩 GONG XI FA CAI MOTHERFUCKERS 😩🙌🏻💯 🐍 IT’S THE YEAR OF THE SNAKE 🐍 and you know what that means, you qipao VIXENS 😋👩👀, It’s time to hypnotize your AHGONG👴👲🏻👲🏻 and AHMA👵👵 with your SLICKEST mandarin oranges 🍊🍊🍊👅👅👅 and coil around the THICCEST HONGBAOS 🉐💰🈵 Get your ssssecret 💕 💕 love notes ready for your 大哥’s VENOMOUS 红包能量 😩😫👅💦💦 Don’t forget to charm your relatives 👴🧓👵👱‍♂🧑 and sssip on BAKKWA 🐍🐍🐍💦 to summon SNAKE GOD HONGBAO BLESSINGS 👌🏻💰💰 Send this to 8⃣8⃣ of your MOST MYSTICAL SNAKE-SLAYING SLUTS 💰💰🙊🙊 and manifest a SEDUCTIVE LION DANCE 🐲🐍💃💃 this CNY‼‼‼ If you get 0⃣-3⃣ replies, your 大肉干 will taste like shed skin 😭😭 If you get 4⃣-7⃣, your 年年有🐍 becomes 年年有🍆🍆💦�� If you get 8⃣+ back, your flat Chinese ass 😶😶😶 will be hissing HUAT AH all year ♨♨🈵🈵‼

Buckle up transit hoes! CUMgestion pricing 💵 starts TODAY! 📅 After 6️⃣ months of edging us all, Hochul 🤢 finally Kathyied in and FLIPPED 🖕 her flop ⏸. Soon midtown 🏙️ will be for PAYPIGS 🐷💸 only. No more cuntgestion 🤧. Time to FLOOD 🌊 the MTA’s guts with cash 💰💲 for public transit till their coffers are leaking a 🐌💦 snail trail💦 of funding. 💵 Driving 🚗 by yourself might be HARDER 🍆🍆🍆 but riding those 💪 strong metal tubes 🚇🚇 in public transit 🚈 is always easy and full of 🍑🍑🍑. Send this to 🔟 of your friends who should RUN A TRAIN 🚉🚉 on you. If you get 5️⃣ back you’re a BUSsin 🚌 bad bitch. If you get 🔟 back you’re a certified SUBway 🚇 slut 💦💦💦.

IT’S 👈 ALMOST 💯🕸 2️⃣0️⃣2️⃣5️⃣ SO 💒💯 IT’S TIME ⏲⏰ TO 🚻🆒 2️⃣0️⃣2️⃣0️⃣-DIVE 💦🙀 INTO 👉➡ SOME 🤷 PUSSY🥟🗜️ 💦 AND DROWN🌊 IN 🍑 SOME ⏳ DICKS🍆‼️ 😣 2️⃣0️⃣2️⃣4️⃣ WAS 👈✨ A 🍂⏰ 🤤DELECTABLE 😋😋 YEAR ⌚️FOR 😻ALL US WHORES‼️ WHO CAN 💦 FORGET ❌❌ THE 👏 SUMMER☀️ 😂 WE 👦🤠 ALL 😋 CHOKED 😩🍽️ON 🌭BRATS🌭, OR ➕💰 THE GOLD 🏅🏅 WINNINGS 🌉EIFFEL TOWERS 🇫🇷AT 😩 THE 👏 PARIS 📸OLYM(SEND)PICS 🎥⁉️ AND 💯💯 REMEMBER🗣️ TO 👌STROKE ✊👋 ONE ❤ OUT FOR 🎁 OLD 👴 JIMMY CARTER, WHO’S 😂 THROWING 🚮😤 IT BACK 😂🔙 ON 🔛🔋 THE BIG 💦NUT🥜 FARM 🐓IN THE 👊 SKY 🏕🏖 🌠👅. SEND 📨 TO 5️⃣ OTHER WHORES 💃🕺OR YOU’LL NEVER ❌‼️ HAVE 👏🈶 A PRESIDENTIAL SIZED 🪩ERECTION 🍆 EVER 😠🌚AGAIN‼️ SENT ✉ TO 🔟 AND 😤👏 YOU’LL 👈👆 BE KISSED 👄 EVERYWHERE 😎 WHEN ⏰🍑 THE 🍗COCK🍆 STRIKES 🕰️MIDNIGHT. 🕯 SEND 📬📩 TO 💦 1️⃣5️⃣ ⚪ AND 👏👏 THIS WILL 🖕 BE 😱🐝 YOUR SLUTTIEST 🍆🍑 YEAR 🤔 YET‼️

RIP JIMMY CUMTER 😔💔, the OG 🤴🍆 of the presidency 🇺🇸 😏 who just turned 100 🎉🎂 and finally decided to STICK IT to life 🔥🍆💦 with a last HURRAH 🕺💥! He was still SLEEPING around 🛏️💥 until his last breath 🏳️‍🌈🍑, proving you can STILL get it up 💪💦 even at a HUNDY 💯🥵! Bye-bye, peanut farm 🍑🌿, time to enjoy THAT BIG COCK in the sky ☁️🖕💦! Joe Biden can only DREAM of that kind of stamina 😴😏😴! So let’s raise a glass 🍺🥂 to the CUMback king 👑🍆 of the South ☀️ and pray his SOUL 🎵 is CUMMING in peace 🙌💦, just like he always dreamed of with his FINE ASS 💃🏿🖤! SEND THIS TO 1️⃣0️⃣ friends, or you’re just gonna have to WAIT a whole century to score 🌌🌌💋!!!

🚨 BREAKING 🌭 FUCKING 🚨 NEWS 🚨: JIMMY 🛠️ CARTER 😐 HAS 🌍 OFFICIALLY➡️ ASCENDED ☁️ OUT 🥜 OF THE PEANUT-USSY ✨ AFTER ⌛ 100 YEARS 🦢 OF ABSOLUTE 🔥 BADASSERY. THIS 🏠 MAN BUILT 🛠️ MORE HOMES 🛠️ THAN 🥜 LEGO, WON A NOBEL-USSY 🏆, AND OUTLIVED 💀 EVERYONE ⭐. NOW 😊 HE'S IN HEAVEN'S ☁️ OVAL OFFICE 🛋️, ROASTING 🔥 NIXON 💀 WITH LINCOLN 🎩 AND PROBABLY TEACHING REAGAN HOW TO BE LESS OF A DICK ✋ SIPPING 🍹 SWEET TEA 🍎, AND DECORATING ✨ WITH RAINBOWS 🌈. REST 🙏 IN POWER 🦢, JIMMY 😊 —HEAVEN'S 👑 NEW ICON ⭐. LONG LIVE 🔥 THE CARTER-USSY 🍑 ✨!​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​

👋💰Shalom SLUTS! 👋 Get your tuchus 🍑 ready 🥵 for EIGHT 🎱 LONG 🍆 DAYS 📅 of 🕎HanukkCOCK✡️ to 🎉celebrate🎉 the time 🕍🍷 D-ddy😇 made 1️⃣ drop of CUM💦👅 last for 8️⃣ GAYS 👬🌈😋 Hang up ⛑️ your yarmulke👲🤠 and spin 💞spin💞 SPIN😵‍💫 on daddy's DREIDEL 🍫🪙💦💦 till you get that 🍖✡️KOSHER COCK 😜😫 in your 👼HOLEiest 🕍of HOLES 🕳️😈🙈 send this text💌📩 to 🔟 of your BADDEST 💇‍♀️ ORTHODOX 🧕 BITCHES 💁‍♀️👄 Get 🔟 or more back 🥳🤯 and you'll be a 🕎MENORAH MOMMY💅 Get 5️⃣ back 😚🤪 and you're a 👯👑 jewish-american 🛏️ PILLOW PRINCESS 💗💟 Get 0️⃣ back 🤒🤢 and you'll get SPANKED 🍑💢 like the MACCABAES 💂 spanked ANTIOCHUS IV EPIPHANES👹👑👿 in 💦JerusaCUM🏙️when he wouldn't let them 🙅 celebrate 🙏SUCKot🥺 Chag sameach! 🔯🌠

🎶Dashing🏃💨 through the cum 💦💧👅👅 in a one WHORES💃💃 open legs👐, over🔁 the clit we go, moaning 😩😫😲 all the way. Balls🍒 in buttholes🍩 ring, making 🙇spirits bright🌟💫, what fun it is to ride 🚀that dick 🍆💦and jizz😩💦 on her all night, HOE!!!!💸 🎶jingle clit🎶jingle clit 🔔jingle🔔 all the way➡, oh what ✨fun✨ it is to ride🏂〰 that big💢 fat💥 dick 🍆all day🕦 HEY👏 🎶jingle clit🎶jingle🎶clit 🔔jingle🔔 all the way😝 oh what 🎉fun🎊 it is to fuck 👉👌and lick 👅💦her jizz away. HEY🙌 Send this to 👉1⃣2⃣🍆 of your sluttiest😝🍆💃 dickmas cock suckers🍆👅 in 6⃣9⃣ sexonds or Mr. Claus🎅 won't cum😩👊💦 for you this HOEliday season!!🎄 If you get 5 back ⬅️you're a frosty cum slut. ❄️⛄️If you get 10 back you're a 🎯peppermint pussy princess .🍭👸 If you get 15 back you're a candy cane 🍰clit🍰 licker👄👅. Have a ✨merry 👋merry✨clitmas🙏🎄and a slutty 🎉new year!🎆🎊

🎄🎄MERRY CHRISTMAS BITCHES 🎄🎄 !! Now that it's finally DICKmas 👅💦 Santa's about to slide 🎅🏼😉 down your hot 🔥hot 🔥 chimney tonight. So lick 💦💋 those juicy candy canes and drink that creamy eggnog 🍼, it's about to get wet down at Santa's workshop 🍆🍆! Don't forget to slide down that XXXtra 🎅🏼🎅🏼 big North POLE, and make sure your 🍪 cookie 🍪 is yummy enough for Santa to eat👄!👀 But are you bad enough to handle Santa's giant juicy 8==candy👊🏽COCK=D💦?? Send this to 🔟 of your baddest bitch elves 👬💁🏼If you get 5️⃣ back, you're on the naughty list this year 🍆💦 ! If you get 🔟 back, you better be ready for Santa's hot CUMlatte ☕️💦😭 If you get 2️⃣0️⃣ back, you've got the most bitchin 🍬peppermint🍬 BUSSY in the North Pole! ❄️⛄️ Hope you get to blow 🌬lots of XXXmas 🎄dick, and that you get lots of XXXmas 🎄CUMMIES 💝💝HAVE A SLUTTY 💦🍆👅 DICKMAS YOU HOE HOE HOE!!! 🎅🏼🎅🏼🎅🏽🎅🏾

🎄🌲🎅🤶🧑‍🎄 MERRY CHRISTMAS SLUTS🎄🌲🎅🧑‍🎄🤶🔔🔮JINGLE BALLS🪩🔔JINGLE BALLS🎱🔔 CUMMIES💦 ALL THE WAY🤪I hope 🤞 Santa CAME 👀💦 last night 🌝 and left you his BIG 😱 PACKAGE🎁📦 or you were NAUGHTY 😈😜 this year🗓️ It’ll be a WHITE ❄️☃️ CHRISTMAS 🎄 when you pa rum pa pum CUM 🤤💦 my LITTLE 🤏 CUMMERBOY 🤭🥁🌨️ You can be 🕺DANCER💃 and 😍VIXEN🥰 and I’ll be ☄️CUM-ET💦 with the 🎋mistle-HOE😜 If you’ve🫵 been a good 😇 little elf🧝 then FATHER 🎅 DICKMAS🍆 will MUNCH 😋 your COOKIES🍪🍪 and DRINK🥵 your CREAMY 💦EGG 🥚NOG 😫 Don’t forget 💭 to slide 🛝 UP ⬆️ and DOWN ⬇️ on Daddy’s 👨 North POLE 💈🥵😍 until you can SLURP😛 his HOT COCK-OLATE🍫☕️☕️ Send ➡️ this to 🔟 of the SLUTTIEST 😛 of 🎅SANTA’S HELPERS ✊ Get 0️⃣ back and you won’t ❌ get a candy 🍬 cane🧑‍🦯 in your 🍬PEPPERMIT PUSSY🍬 Get 5️⃣ back and you’ll be 🤔donning now 👇 all ye 🏳️‍🌈👩‍❤️‍💋‍👩GAY APPAREL👨‍❤️‍💋‍👨🏳️‍🌈🏳️‍🌈✨ Get 🔟 back and it won’t be a SILENT 🤫 NIGHT 🌚 when DADDY🎅 CLAUS🎅 FINDS 👀👉 your MERRY CLIT-MAS😱🫘🫛🐱😻🎄🌲🎅🤶🧑‍🎄

Here 💦CUMS💦 🎅🏽Santa Claus,🎅🏽 here 💦CUMS💦 🎅🏽Santa Claus,🎅🏽 right down 👩🏽👸🏽slutty girl lane!👩🏽👸🏽 ❌🚫❌🚫STOP!!!!!!!!!!!!!❌🚫❌🚫 Is your 👨🏻👨🏻daddy👨🏻👨🏻 not giving you enough 💦💦💦cummies?!💦💦💦 Hold up,🙅🏽🙅🏽🙅🏽 ho! It's 💦💦cummy💦💦 ❄️💦❄️SEASON!❄️💦❄️ Push✋🏽✋🏽 that 👨🏻👨🏻daddy👨🏻👨🏻 to the ⏩⏩side⏩⏩ and let a 👌🏽NEW👌🏽 father in 🏡YOUR CHIMNEY!! 🏡 🎅🏽🎅🏽🎅🏽Father CHRISTMAS,🎅🏽🎅🏽🎅🏽 the 👑👑KING👑👑 of 💦cummies!💦 That's right,👍🏼 he's been making 👧🏽little👧🏽 👧🏽girls👧🏽 squishy for 6️⃣ CENTURIES. Don't ❎❎ mind the old saying; he ONLY makes the 💦😫😫😈NAUGHTIEST😈😫😫💦girls ☁️squishy☁️! So send this to all the 😼nastiest😼 👧🏽girls👧🏽 you know and share❗️Those❗️Cummies❗️Get 0️⃣ back and you're a basic 🌑🌑coal-slinging bitch.🌑🌑 Get 5️⃣ back and you get 👅eaten👅 like 🍪cookies🍪and 👅💦slurped💦👅 like 🍼milk!🍼 Get 1️⃣0️⃣ back and 🎅🏽Santa's🎅🏽 big 🍆🍆COCK🍆🍆 will grow⏫⏫ 3️⃣ sizes inside of you!😫😩 Get 1️⃣5️⃣ back and you become Mrs. Claus, and get 🍑🍌🍆yummy 🍒🍭🍼nummy 🍼💦☁️squishy🍼💦☁️ 💧💧cummies💧💧 until next ⏩🌨☃Christmas!🌨☃

SURPRISE! You have been smacked by the CHRISTMAS COCK MONSTER right in your face! *THWACK* There’s just ONE rule. You can’t cock slap someone that has already cock slapped you!! Try to cock slap as many as possible before they cock slap you. I have already smacked you in your face, so you can’t cock slap me. Good luck! /    イ              (((ヽ (    ノ                 ￣Y  \ |   ( \      (.       /)     |     ) ヽ   ヽ `  ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)  _ノ    /      ＼   |   ⌒Ｙ⌒   /  /          | ヽ     |      ﾉ ／          ＼トー仝ーイ               | ミ土彡/             ) \      °   /            (     \      /     )           /       / ѼΞΞΞΞΞΞΞD        /  /     /      \ \   \        ( (    ).           ) ).  )       (      ).            ( |    |        |    /                \    | Pass the Christmas Cockmonster

🛋️👴📖Twas the night 😴🌃 before Christmas🎄🎁, and all through the whorehouse🏠👯‍♀️, The walls were a-shakin’🫨🏚️😏 as Santa 🎅blew your back out!🔥💥🍆🥵‼️‼️ His balls🥜 were a-twitchin’🥴 and slappin’ your butt🫲🍑😱! You squealed like a reindeer 🦌🗣️😩and busted a nut!!💥!💥💣💦😵‍💫! There’s one ☝️✨special✨ reason that Santa🎅 came through, To cum 😉down ⬇️👇the chimney 🦵🦪🦵😏of little-ol’ you🫵🫵… You rode🐎🤪 the North Pole🎅💈🦴😛 to your big claim to fame🥳🏆: The top ⬆️🏁of his 😈Naughty🔥List😈 has your🫵 given name!💯 —--- 💌💌💌Send this to 1️⃣2️⃣ NASTIES of NAVIDAD😈💋👯 so Santa👉🎅👈 knows🤔 whose house 🏘️to hit next!🔜 None back🙅↩️: one year 🗓️of chase🔒🔒 cock neglect😭😭😭!!! 6 back: your fruitcake🥧 is gonna get wrecked👊👊! 12 back…☝️✌️ WELL…😳 make sure your booty🍑🕳️ is prepped 🫦🐴🦴😩🥵😱 😉 — 🎅🗣️📣“To the window!🪟 To the wall!🧱 Til the sweat🥵💧 drips down⬇️ my balls🍠! Now, dash away!🏃‍♂️💨 Dash away! 🏇Dash away🌰🔩 all!” I heard him exclaim📢🔊, as he flew out of sight 👀🌫️- 🎅🎅🎅“MERRY CHRISTMAS TO ALL,💯💯 AND TO ALL SOME GOOD PIPE‼️🎁!🍆”

👅💦👨🏻FELIZ NAVIDADDY 👨🏻👅💦🧑‍🎄⁉️ARE YOU READY TO GET YOUR JINGLE BALLS ROCKED ⁉️ 🎄today we celebrate jesus first CUMMING 😩 and encourage his second 💦 🧑‍🎄prepare to be FILLED 😩 with holiday cheer😉 you’ve heard of ELF ON THE SHELF 🧝🏼‍♂️ but get ready to REARRANGE HER 🤶🏽😵‍💫 UNDER THE MANGER 🐪🍃👅 santa’s got a BIG 😮 SWEET 🍭STICKY 💧🍯 CANDY CANE 🍬to put under your tree not only is santa claus coming to town 🏘️ but he’s also PENETRATING 👉🏼👌🏼the CHIMNEY 🕳️ 💨 and CUMMING ON ME ☃️ so don’t come a KNOCKIN 🤰🏻if the sleighs a ROCKIN 🛷😩 if you’ve got the cookie 🍪👅 santa’s got the MILK 🍼💦 and santa is HUNG 🍆‼️like the ornaments ‼️on your tree 🎄❓SO ASK YOURSELF ❓will you be TOPPING 😜👆🏼your tree this year or BOTTOMING? 😋 👇🏼 send this to 1️⃣0️⃣ of your SLUTTIEST ELVES 🧝🏼‍♀️🧝🏼‍♂️👅 to receive a WHITE 🍼💦 christmas 😩🧑‍🎄 if you don’t get 1️⃣0️⃣ back get ready for santa’s 👅🪨ROCK HARD🪨👅 coal 😵‍💫

🥺😓DIVA DOWN! 😫🚨💔 American hero 🇺🇸 🍝Luigi Mangione 🔥👨‍🍳has been ARRESTED 🚔 for OFFING💦 the CE-HOE👨🏻‍💼of 🍆UNITED HEALTHCUCK 🍆! He was so 🔥💦 HOT 😍👅 that even the cops 🐷🚓 couldn’t resist scooping up that FINE ASS 🍑! Now it’s time to CUM together 🧑‍🧑‍🧒‍🧒💦 and scream 😩 “FREE LUIGI!”😫😫 ⏪ so he can KEEP THRUSTING BACKSHOTS 💥🍑 into those CORRUPT EXECUTIVES HARD 💪🍌Send this to 5️⃣ of your most THIRSTY 🥤💦 friends, and if you don’t want a piece of LUIGI’S beefy BUNS 🍖🍑🥵, you deserve your high ass DICKDUCTIBLE! 💦

MAMMA MIA! 🤓🏻 It looks like 😄🤙 the United Healthcare ⚕🌌 CEO killer 🗡 has 👏 been 🤤 identifed... by this PUSSY. Luigi Mangione is 👏 officially a person of interest. 👀 No 😠♂ one expected 🤰🤰 his 👦 face 😣😩 card to SLAY 👌 the way it 🍝 did. 📍👆 His ‼🌾 GoodReads has 💰 also 😨😛 been 🙂 released. We love 🤗🎉 a 👌 well-read young 💦🎶 man. It also 👨👨 looks like this 👈🏄 ZADDY came 💦 from 😲 MONEY, 💵 HONEY. He 👱 was ☠ his 💦✅ high school 🏫🏤 valedictorian where tuition was 👏🅰 40K a 🏿💰 year. 😣📅 He 🤣👨 is also 👨 an ex-Ivy 🅱 league 🏀🏀 student. 🎓 Just admit you want 😩 him 😎 bad. 😞😡

Bashar Al ASSad 🍑 has finally been KICKED OUT 🥾💨 from his 🏛️ throne 🍑🌍 and he’s looking like a SORRY SLUT 😢🍆 with no DADDY to suck on! 💦👅🍆 This DIRTY DICTATOR is getting REPLACED 🔄 like it’s a used condom 🎈😖 oh let’s not forget that FINE SYRIAN PUSSY 🍆👀 he used to run the show! 🎭💦💦 While he’s crying in the corner 📉😢, the new PRESIDENT is getting MOUNTED 🐴🌞 by the whole nation 🇸🇾💖 get that new regime UP IN THAT ASS 🍑🌈 or you ain’t getting no BLOWBACK 💨💋💦 Send this to 8️⃣ 👄💦 of your best HOE army 🏋️‍♀️❤️ if you don’t get at least 6️⃣ back, you’ll be stuck with THAT OLD HAG 🍆👵🏼💥 for another four years! 🎉😳😙

‼️🌊BAY AREA TSUNAMI WARNING‼️🌉☠️ LISTEN UP, ALL MY TIDAL WAVE 🌀 WARRIORS 🌊 AND MARINA DISTRICT MERMAIDS 🧜‍♀️✨—THE PACIFIC 👀 JUST DELIVERED A BIG 🌟WET💦 SERVE, AND BABE, WE ARE NOT READY‼️🚨 THE TEKTONIC 🪨 TWINKS PLAYED TOO HARD 🫣 AND NOW MOTHER EARTH 🌎 SAID, “HOLD MY SUBDUCTION ZONE” 🔥😱 💥THIS IS YOUR FINAL WARNING, TSUNAMI TESLAS ⚡🚗 AND GOLDEN GATE GIRLIES 🌉💅—RUN🏃💨TO HIGHER GROUND ⛰️ OR GET WASHED 👋INTO THE OCEAN’S INFLUENCER FILTER 💧✨. SHOUTOUT TO ALL THE COASTAL 🌊KARENS 💼 AND OAKLAND 🏀OPPORTUNISTS WHO KNOW THEIR EMERGENCY KITS 🛠️ WERE NEVER THAT GIRL 💀. BUT WAIT, THERE’S HOPE✨—IF YOU GET 10 OF YOUR BAY 🏝️BESTIES TO SEND THIS BACK 🔄, A MERCIFUL MERMAID 🧜‍♀️ MIGHT SLAY 😘THAT WAVE 💃. OTHERWISE, RIP TO ALL THE SEAWALL 👋SUZIES AND SANDY BEACH BETTIES—CAUSE THE BIG ONE 🌊💀IS SERVING ALL CAPS: DOOM 🩵🤡.

The CEO 👨🏼‍💼of 🍆UNITED HEALTHCUCK 🍆has been 💦JERKED OFF TO COMPLETION (if you know what I mean 😏) Please join me in sharing our sincere 🍆COCKDOLANCES 😱for the LONG and HARD 🫦life had by the man 👨 who SUCKED US DRY 👅and MADE US CRY 😭with his 💦ORGASM COVERAGE DENIAL🧎We are all DRIPPING WET 💦and MOIST TO THE TOUCH 👅😩with tears 😢and cum 🍆at this TRADICKTY of a man who’s sole purpose in life was to 🤸BEND US OVER 👅and FUCK THE PUBLIC RAW 👋🍑🍆 Better hope your 💦🫦CUM DOCTOR💦 is in NUTWORK 🕳️so you can meet your😩🍆 DICKDUCTIBLE and get the CARE🙏 you desperately need 🥴👉👌

🚨‼️BREAKING NEWS‼️🚨: Daddy Biden 🍦👴🏻 just yanked off 🥵💦 the handcuffs 🚔from his lil’ criminal son 🦸‍♂️💨 Hunter 🍑😈! He said, You’re FREE to F*CK 🙊🍆🎊 all the strippers 👯‍♀️ and blow 🙈💨 your money 💰💦 on whatever WILD STUFF💥 you want!” 🎉💃💦😏 Now Hunter’s 🧍‍♂️out here 🏃‍♂️💨 living his best life 🌈💖, tossing 🍌 to every baddie he sees 🥵😜💃🕺! “You can’t CAGE me, DADDY!” 😂✋he shouts 🗣️💪💦 as he SWINGS 🍆 their way at THE CLUB🪩 🥳 where fruity🍒 cocktails🍹 flow like his unfiltered 🥺emotions 😭💦! Joe’s like “Just don’t CUM 💦🏡 home too late ⏰👀, or I’m gonna SPANK that ass 🍑👋” CAN YOU 👉EVEN IMAGINE 🤯? Hunter’s gonna go down⬇️ in history 📜📖 as the 🥇FIRST SON 👦 who gets BOTH a PARDON 🤝👨‍⚖️AND A POUNDING! 🍆🍑💥 Let’s raise 🆙 a toast 🥂📣 to this family’s 💥wild 💥ride on the ROLLERCOASTER 🎢 of love🥰 and bad decisions! 🎉💖🍾

👏🏼🗓️ITS THE NATIONAL🫡🇺🇸DAY FOR GIVING😏👅AND RECEIVING 😩😍HAPPY TAINTSGIVING 🍗👀THE EURO-PEE-ONS 💧🌽CAME 💦TO PLYMOUTH ROCK 🍆🪨HARD 🫦🥴STUFFED 👉🏼👌🏼THEIR TURQUEEFS 🦃🫢AND 😛💧GUZZLED GRAVY😶‍🌫️☔️ COVERED GIZZARDS 🥜TODAY 🫵🏼WE CELEBRATE👏🏼 BY BUTTERING 👅🧈ROLLS 🥐🎃PUMP-KIN ✊🏼💦CREAM 🥛👉🏼IN PIES 🥧AND EATING 👄cASSeroles 🍑CALL UP 📲YOUR MASHED 😉POTATHOES 😮‍💨AND 🦃TURKEY THOTS 🏃🏻‍♀️😈AND SPLIT 🙌🏽YOUR WISHBONER 🦴WITH THEM💥➡️SEND THIS TO 1️⃣0️⃣ OF YOUR🤩 HORNY-COPIAS📯🎉GET 1️⃣0️⃣ BACK AND UR ‼️🤯 GETTING STUFFED👊🏼2️⃣NIGHT 🍖🙀GET LESS😵⬇️THAN 5️⃣AND YOURE 🫨❌A BLUMPKIN PIE😰🍰

🎃👻👅🦇 HAPPY HALLOWEEN SLUTS!! 😈🍬🎃 It’s time ⏰ to get your freak on 👅🍆 under the full moon 🌕🍑 and sip on some spooky HOOch 🍹💦👻 while your pumpclit🎃 is ready for some PRETTY CREAM PIE 🎃😘 CUM🍭💦 Let’s carve 🗡️🍑 those pumpkins like we carve 👉🍌👉 that ASS 🍑💦 Trick or SKEET you dirty BITCHES 🍬👅🍭 and don’t forget to collect those SWEET CUMMIES 🍦💦 before the GHOSTS 👻 come and steal your COCK 🍆👻🦇⚰️ Boo! 🎃😱💦 Guess what’s lurking in the shadows? Just a bunch of horny 🎃👻 DEMONS ready to DICK you DOWN! 🍆👿😈 If you send this to 3️⃣ of your spookiest SLUTS 👻💃, you'll be getting MOUNTED 💦💦 all pumped full of a huge Halloweiner! If you get 5️⃣ back, you’re officially the QUEEN 👑 of the haunted CUMMUNITY 💀🍑💦 Let’s GHOST 👻 the cumpetition and make this Hallowqueen loads of spooky spunky FUN 🔥💦💦🍭😜👻🍬

‼️ 💃🏼DIVA DOWN⬇️💃🏼‼️ CUM-VICTED 💦 FELON 🚨DONALD TRUMP 🍊HAS HAD AN ASS🍑 ASS🍑 INATION ATTEMPT 🤔 IN BUTT-LER 🍑 PENISYLVANIA 🍆 MULTIPLE LOADS 💦 WERE SHOT 🔫😏 AT HIS HEAD 😫 BUT THEY DID 🙅🏼‍♀️❌ NOT ❌🙅🏼‍♀️ SLAY 💅🏻💀 SEND THIS TO 5️⃣0️⃣ OF YOUR CUNTIEST 💁🏼‍♀️💅🏻 CUM-SERVATIVES 🐘❤️IF YOU GET 2️⃣5️⃣ BACK YOU DODGED 🏃‍♂️ THE BULLET 🚅 IF YOU GET 0️⃣ BACK YOU’RE NEXT 🫵🏻😧